My Cup Overflows

       Three days ago, two of my best friends got married.  It was one of the most joyful occasions of my life.  I have known them both for a while, the groom since 2003 and the bride since a couple year after that.  Over these last couple of days, I've been trying to process it all.  I know weddings are supposed to be joyful occasions, but what made this wedding so different?  What made this wedding so special?  Why am I finding it hard to express how overwhelmingly joyful I am?

Em and I love a good pun!

     Friendship.  This is what makes the difference.  The people that got married are my friends.  They have played an enormous role in my life.  I met Philip at a time when I really needed friends.  I had had a conversion, which caused me to lose a lot of friends.  I needed companionship, I needed support in living the Christian life, I needed to be loved.  Philip, along with others, filled that role.  I have known Emily for a while, but it wasn't until I began working with her at my first priestly assignment that I really got to be friends with her.  She quickly became like a sister to me.  We are both hilarious (we love puns!) and love to have a good time.  Philip has challenged me to consider ideas and positions that I would normally overlook.  Emily has helped me to get to work when I need to, and also helps me not to take myself too seriously.  They have both helped me to grow in many ways.  As hard as it is to say, I have also helped them.  As a friend, and as a priest, I have guided them in different ways throughout their lives.  Philip has recently recounted to me a time during college when I asked him if he was doing ok.  Admittedly, I don't recall that interaction, but he says it was a big moment for him, and he is thankful.  In my years at Wisdom, I had several real conversations with Emily, mostly about guys.  It was awesome to see their relationship develop, for them both to finally find the one, and to help prepare them for marriage.  On the night they got engaged they had some friends over at Phil's parents' house, and I was able to bless them and their engagement.  A few days later on my birthday, they asked me to preside at their wedding.

My sweet birthday cod (card) asking
me to preside at their wedding.

     That idea of friendship extends beyond just the amazing couple.  Through them so many people were brought together.  Another priest friend preached the homily for the Nuptial Mass (amazing!).  During the homily I got to sit, enjoy, and look out.  Of course I got to look out at Phil and Em as they listened attentively.  But I also got to look out beyond them.  It filled my heart with inexpressible joy to look out and to see so many people that I love so dearly.  I saw many families that have taken me in as one of their own, some as a friend of their child, others as a priest.  I saw many people that I've worked with and have become close to.  I saw people who I meet with regularly for a book club.  I saw people who's marriages I've witnessed, who's babies I've baptized, people with whom I've celebrated and mourned.  I saw my parents, my brother priests, and so many others who challenge me to be more generous, who challenge me to be holy.  C.S. Lewis writes about friendship in his book, The Four Loves.  He writes about how the love of friends is not exclusive.  In fact, he says that people become more interesting, and friendships deepen if you expand the group.  Philip brings out something in me that only he can bring out.  Emily brings out something in me that only she can bring out.  When they are not around, that part of me lies dormant.  I have loved being introduced to more people, including more people in our friend group through Philip and Emily.  Several people made the remark to me and others after the wedding that they want to be friends with us because they love what we have!  In this authentic growth, our friendships deepen, and we grow, we become more truly who we are in the process.

Incensing the altar during the preparation of the gifts.

     The thing about all of these people and this idea of friendship is that it is real!  One of the most memorable ideas is in the section on friendship from The Four Loves is when C.S. Lewis distinguishes the love of friends from intimate love by saying that lovers stand facing each other and gaze at each other, into each others eyes, whereas friends stand side by side and gaze together at some common thing.  Friendship can be based on any common interest, but the deeper, the more meaningful that toward which friends look, the deeper, the more meaningful the friendship.  This is why my friendship with Philip and Emily is so wonderful.  It is based on God.  That is the foundation.  That is the common interest.  He is the common goal toward Whom we are striving.  This was captured in a strikingly beautiful picture from their wedding.  Our entire life should look like this picture.  All three of us, facing the same direction, facing the Lord.  My love for them is so deep and real because they help to keep me focused on Him.  They demand that I am a good friend, they demand that I am a good Catholic, they demand that I am a good priest!  By the way they live their lives, they help me to stay on the straight and narrow path that leads to life.

     Another thing that has amazed me about the wedding is how quickly this beautiful couple began living the sacrament.  Each sacrament has an outward sign that points us to the inward reality.  In baptism, for example, we wash with water symbolizing the inward reality of sin being removed from the soul.  In marriage, the outward sign is the couple, the people themselves.  They are to be, in their love for God and for one another, a sign to the world of God's love.  They became this sign in a real way when they exchanged their vows.  They lived as this sign by their attentiveness at Mass.  They lived as this sign by their focus on the Lord with and for each other.  I know they lived as this sign well because of the many people I have heard comment on it.  People have said it was the most beautiful, the most prayerful wedding they've ever been to.  People expressed sorrow at not having friends that live out the faith like this couple and their friends.  I know they lived as this sign because they told me that their wedding Mass was like a retreat for them!  May they always continue to live as a sign to the world, a world so desperately in need of God's love.

     In thinking about writing my reflections on the wedding, I kept going back to verses from Scripture that speak of God's abundant goodness.  The title I chose is from Psalm 23.  I also think of the quote I used for my prayer card when I was ordained a priest.  I chose Psalm 116: 12-13, which reads: "How can I repay the LORD / for all the great good done for me? / I will raise the cup of salvation / and call on the name of the LORD."  How do I repay the Lord and my friends for their goodness to me?  I live my life well.  I can only repay the Lord and my friends by living my vocation well, by being a good priest.  That is what the Lord asks of me.  That is what my friends need from me.  That is what will bring my and many other souls to heaven.  Lord, I thank you for the many many blessings you have lavished upon me.  I thank you for my friends, for my family, and for my faith.  I thank you for the great gift you have given me in calling me to be your priest.  Help me to repay you by raising the cup of salvation and calling up on your name!

Holy Thursday 2018

Today, was an unexpectedly emotional day.  If I had to sum it all up in a few words, I'd say, "I love being a priest."

Today is Holy Thursday, the day in which Catholics celebrate the end of Lent, and the beginning of the Easter Triduum, the holiest three days of the year.  It is also the day in which in dioceses around the world, priests come together to celebrate the Chrism Mass with their bishop.  At this Mass, priests renew the promises they made at ordination.  In the evening, each parish has the first Triduum liturgy, the Mass of the Lord's Supper.

I began the day as I normally do, with an hour of prayer in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament.  I then did some office work before I had to get ready for the Chrism Mass.  Just before Mass and the renewal of priestly promises, I went to confession.  I confessed those sins that I had committed since my last confession (as we always do in confession), but then I went through an extensive list of shortcomings in living out my priestly promises over the last year.  It was humbling to admit how far I am from the ideal of the priest, from being an alter Christus, another Christ.  I am far from perfect, but with God's grace I press on, confident that He can work with imperfect instruments.

The crucifixion scene to the right caught my attention.

I must admit I was a little saddened by the rain.  Because of the weather, we did not process in like we normally do, which includes a row of Cathedral Carmel students on each side of the procession welcoming us and cheering us on as we make our way into the cathedral.  This has brought me a whole new level of joy now that I am assigned at the Cathedral and know many of the students.  Instead of the normal procession, we priests were seated when Mass began.  I was moved up from one of the last pews to the second pew which for some reason had remained empty.  This brought Luke 14:10 to life!  Whereas before I was seated far away, and behind a huge pillar, now I was seated up close with a wonderful view of the beautiful stained glass windows that adorn the sanctuary.  Gazing up at that window, which I have looked at many times, I was reminded of the fact that I am called to that too!  Yes, today is a wonderful day of celebration and joy, but it is followed by Good Friday.  As His priest, I am called to offer myself daily for my flock, and many times it will look like the cross, not like today.  One thing I have come to learn though, is that even in the Cross, there is joy...maybe even especially in the Cross!

In just a few days, I will turn 33, the traditional age at which Jesus died.  I have been commenting on this to a few people lately saying that this is my year!  Of course, it is up to God when He calls me home, but I do think that this will be a very important year in my life.  I'm not sure what He has in store for me, but I know that whatever it is He will also give me the grace to do it.  With this in mind, I was moved by the opening hymn for the Chrism Mass.  It was To Jesus Christ, Our Sovereign King, which we used to sing each week after Benediction at St. Ben's.  It brought back great memories from my two years there.  I was also struck by the final verse: "To You and to Your Church, great King,/We pledge our hearts' oblation;/Until before Your throne we sing/In endless jubilation."  This was the fourth time I have renewed my priestly promises, but for some reason this year seemed more serious.  Singing that I pledge my heart's oblation, I meant it...I really want more than anything to be holy and to help others do the same!  Lord, help me to be a good and holy priest.

Another source of emotion for me today was that it was the first Chrism Mass without Msgr. Mouton (at least physically present...I know he was certainly there!).  It helped me to realize once more just how thankful I am for his priesthood.  He taught me so much, not only in the many conversations we had, but more so in the prayerful and dedicated way that he lived out his priesthood.  I don't know if there is anyone I have known personally that has been more priestly in everything he did.  Msgr, help me to be a good and holy priest!

Finally, the decorations!  It probably isn't a big surprise that a church would use white roses for decorations during the Triduum, but they still got me!  Anyone who knows me knows about my great love for St. Thérèse, and her great love for me!  I can't get into the all the details, but suffice it to say that through a novena I prayed to St. Thérèse early on in theology, white roses have become a symbol for me of my call to the priesthood.  Over and over and over again I have "received" white roses exactly when I needed them.  Each time I am troubled, or doubting my call or my ability to live it out, white roses appear!  What better day than today, the day of the institution of the priesthood to have that reminder once again from my tireless intercessor.  One of my friends (a self-admitted creeper) kept some of the white roses from my first Mass decorations.  Three years later she gave them to me arranged around one of my favorite quotes of St. Thérèse.  She wrote it to a young priest who was struggling in his vocation, but I like to think she said it to me (and repeats it often); "Truly, only in heaven will you know how dear you are to me."  St. Therese, help me to be a good and holy priest.

Did I say finally?  One more thing.  I was also reminded today what one of my seminarian classmates  that shared my birthday pointed out to me.  In 1985 (the year I was born), my birthday fell on Holy Thursday.  Now I know that there are many, many priests who were not born on Holy Thursday, but I see this as another assurance of God's call, and of His great love for me.  "Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you."  Before I was ever a thought on earth, God knew that He would create me to be a priest.  I truly believe this.  I truly believe that it is the source of my joy and happiness in being a priest...that I KNOW without the shadow of a doubt that I am being who God created me to be...that I am doing what God created me to do.

What a great day to renew my promises.  Here is what that looks like:

Beloved sons,
on the anniversary of that day
when Christ our Lord conferred his priesthood
on his Apostles and on us,
are you resolved to renew
in the presence of your Bishop and God’s holy people,
the promises you once made?

The Priests, all together, respond: I am.

Are you resolved to be more united with the Lord Jesus
and more closely conformed to him,
denying yourselves and confirming those promises
about sacred duties towards Christ&srquo;s Church
which, prompted by love of him,
you willingly and joyfully pledged
on the day of your priestly ordination?

Priests: I am. 

Are you resolved to be faithful stewards of the mysteries of God
in the Holy Eucharist and the other liturgical rites
and to discharge faithfully the sacred office of teaching,
following Christ the Head and Shepherd,
not seeking any gain,
but moved only by zeal for souls?

Priests: I am.

I have met so many amazing people in my six years of seminary and now almost four years of priesthood.  I know that I have been able to do many good things because of God's grace, and your prayers.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your love and prayers.  Please, continue to pray for me, that I may be a good and holy priest!

Lord, I don't know why you saw fit to call me to be a priest, but I am thankful, and I absolutely love being your priest!

Vacation Reveals the Vocation

            This past Thursday I left for a little Labor Day Weekend getaway with some friends.  We left Lafayette around 2:45pm and got to Orange Beach, AL just after 11:00pm…yes almost 8.5 hours later (this is usually a little over a 5 hour trip).  We came to a complete stop at least 4 times on the Interstate during the course of our travels, which made for the extended trip…that along with a stop at Café du Monde and Cracker Barrel.

            At one of the standstills several emergency responder vehicles were passing by us.  I made a comment that this situation always makes me nervous as a priest.  After several more vehicles passed us and an Air Med helicopter flew over us, I, prompted by my friends went to see what was going on.  I got out of the drivers seat, grabbed my anointing oil, book, and stole and ran towards the accident.  Since I was traveling I was in khaki short, a white polo (Geaux Cajuns), and Chocó’s…not the easiest to run in!

            As I got closer, I could see a car that had run off of the road and partially into the woods.  There were many emergency personnel cars blocking the road with police standing by them.  I introduced myself to the first one that I came to, telling him that I was a Catholic priest and wanted to see if they needed me.  He told me to go speak to another officer a little farther up.  I did so, and she gave me the go ahead.  As I got closer, I noticed an ambulance along with the helicopter in the road.  I went up to a truck where people were gathered and introduced myself to them.  One of the people in the truck was a middle-aged woman who had been in the car that went off the road due to a blow out.  She seemed fine, except for a sore shoulder and being understandably shaken.  This woman was traveling with her fiancé, who had been thrown from the car and was in far worse shape.  I asked her if he was Catholic and she responded yes.  I asked her if she thought he would want to be anointed and she again responded yes.  I walked to the ambulance where the paramedics were working on him.  I waited outside and told the fireman standing nearby who I was and what I wanted to do.  He said that it wasn’t a problem, but that I would have to probably do it while they brought him to the helicopter.

            As I waited, I watched the paramedics and a doctor who also happened to be in the traffic work on the man and get prepping him to be put on the Air Med helicopter.  I also sent a message to my friends waiting in the car to pray for Julian (that was his name).  Once they got him out of the back of the ambulance, I got a little better look at him.  Though he was conscious, he had pretty serious injuries to his head.  I had been standing there for a while, so I had my stole on with my anointing card (for situations just like this) and my oil ready.  After they got him out and transferred him to another stretcher, I jumped in for a few seconds and anointed him.  I stepped back to all them to work on him again.  From behind a row of first responders I held up my hand and prayed the beautiful prayer called the Apostolic Pardon, which is to be given in danger of death (“Through the holy mysteries of our redemption, may almighty God release you from all punishments in this life and in the life to come.  May He open to you the gates of paradise and welcome you to everlasting joy.”).  I noticed out of the corner of my eye that as I prayed, the firefighter that I had talked to extended his hand over the man to join in the prayer.

            A few seconds later, they were wheeling him to the helicopter.  I turned and began to walk back to the car.  I let the man’s fiancé know that I anointed him and that I would pray for them.  I continued my walk and the second police officer that I had approached stopped me and thanked me for coming to see about the man.  Along the way, many people were out of their cars and asked me what happened.  I told them briefly that there had been an accident and that one man was seriously injured.  When I got back to the car I got in and my friends were in the middle of praying the rosary.  We continued praying and it wasn’t’ long before the helicopter flew away and we were moving.  When we finished the rosary, one of my friends made a comment that this had been a “Fishers of Men” moment.  For those of you who don’t know, “Fishers of Men” is a video that the USCCB put out several years ago to promote vocations (Click here to watch the Fisher's of Men video).  The story revolves around a priest coming up on an accident and anointing a young man as he dies in his arms.  A young boy witnesses this.  As the priest walks away he tells the boy hello.  The video then cuts to an ordination, which makes one think that it was the boy that witnessed the actions of that priest that is being ordained.  We continued our long trip with several more stops, though none of them were as intense as this one.

            As I said earlier, we arrived a little after 11pm.  I had waited to celebrate Mass so that my friends could have Mass that day.  We brought our things up to our condo quickly and set up so that we could get Mass in before midnight.  We began normally.  One of my friends read the readings, then handed me the Missal for the Gospel.  I had not looked at the readings before now because I figured I’d give my friends a break and not preach.

            I took the missal, bent down and said the prayer before proclaiming the gospel (“Cleanse my heart and my lips, almighty God that I may worthily proclaim your holy gospel”), and then I began.  “The Lord be with you.”  “And with your spirit.”  “A reading from the Holy Gospel according to Luke.”  “Glory to you O Lord.”  

While the crowd was pressing in on Jesus and listening to the word of God,
he was standing by the Lake of Gennesaret.
He saw two boats there alongside the lake;
the fishermen had disembarked and were washing their nets.
Getting into one of the boats, the one belonging to Simon,
he asked him to put out a short distance from the shore.
Then he sat down and taught the crowds from the boat.
After he had finished speaking, he said to Simon,
“Put out into deep water and lower your nets for a catch.”
Simon said in reply,
“Master, we have worked hard all night and have caught nothing,
but at your command I will lower the nets.”
When they had done this, they caught a great number of fish
and their nets were tearing.
They signaled to their partners in the other boat
to come to help them.
They came and filled both boats
so that the boats were in danger of sinking.
When Simon Peter saw this, he fell at the knees of Jesus and said,
“Depart from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man.”
For astonishment at the catch of fish they had made seized him
and all those with him,
and likewise James and John, the sons of Zebedee,
who were partners of Simon.
Jesus said to Simon, “Do not be afraid;
from now on you will be catching men.”
When they brought their boats to the shore,
they left everything and followed him.

God has an amazing way of getting my attention when he wants to!  Once I realized what gospel it was, I almost couldn’t finish proclaiming it.  Although I had not planned it I did give a homily.  I don’t remember exactly what I said, but it was something along the lines of, “Can you believe that?  God knows what he is doing!”  After celebrating over 1,000 Masses in my 2+ years of priesthood, I have to admit that many times I no longer have that amazement that I had initially.  Don’t get me wrong, I look at the Mass as the most important part of my day.  I try as best I can to celebrate it reverently and well.  But, many times I don’t comprehend what it is I get to do (not that we can ever comprehend it fully this side of heaven).  But celebrating that Mass I prayed harder.   I feel like I celebrated it with the mindset that I should celebrate every Mass, the way I am reminded to celebrate every time I have Mass with the Missionaries of Charity.  They have a sign where I vest that reads: “Remember, priest of God, celebrate this Mass as if it were your first Mass, as if it were your last Mass, as if it were your only Mass.”

            Thank you Lord for this wonderful gift with which you have entrusted me.  Thank you for calling me to be your priest.  Thank you for allowing me to be there in that uncomfortable situation, to administer the Sacrament of your Church to that man in need.  Thank you for reminding me why you have called me to this life.  Thank you for reminding me that I’m called to this life for nothing other than to save souls!  Thank you for allowing my vacation to strengthen my vocation.  Help me to cooperate with your grace so that I can continue serving you and you Church, and to do so more faithfully.

Fr. Broussard

Solemnity of the Immaculate Conception - 12.8.2014

I don't know how to put my homilies up on the RCC website yet, so I will post here.  This is my homily from the Solemnity of the Immaculate Conception on Monday.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B_Io8Icgf0pQVmZzNmR1Qk55TTg/view?usp=sharing

Reflections: Four Years in the Eternal City

There is a line in the 1998 song Closing Time by SemiSonic which goes, “Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.”  I feel that it is an appropriate quote as I make these reflections on my time in Rome on the brink of priestly ordination on June 21^st.  This past week, I was asked to give some words at a fundraiser for the NAC (The North American College, which is where I lived in Rome) in New Orleans.  As I thought about what I might say, what was unique about my time in seminary in Rome, one word made its way into my thoughts that seemed to tie what I wanted to say together: Friendship.  There are three different areas of friendship that I would like to focus on to describe my four years of formation in Rome.

Dinner with some friends as we travel.

The first type of friendship is friendship in the traditional sense.  One of the tough things about studying theology in Rome is that we do not come home very often.  For most of us, the first summer is spent away from home.  That means that we have amazing, once in a lifetime opportunities during those 2-3 months, but it also means that we do not see family, friends, or home for almost 2 full years.  Because of that, I think that the men at the NAC form deep, lasting friendships with each other, and this was certainly true for me.  As I prepared to leave Rome and head back to South Louisiana for good, I was obviously very happy to be returning home.  However, there were many things that I realized I would miss about Rome, and perhaps the thing that I will miss most is living in a house with so many close friends.  Though I made many friends, there were about 10-15 men to whom I became particularly close.  Our bonds of friendship were deepened due to our common experience of being away from home, our going through classes at the university together, the common formation we received at the NAC, and the many wonderful opportunities we had to travel together all over Europe.  In the days before I left I had to say goodbye to a few friends who managed to finish finals before me.  On the day of my clap-out (a NAC tradition for those returning home), I had to say goodbye to many more friends who were finishing up their finals.  It was hard because I realized that I would never see some of them again in this life.  Though it was difficult, I was comforted by two thoughts.  The first was that I know that I will see many of the men with whom I am close again.  We have already made a pact to get together each year in a different hometown of one of us so that we can all experience the wonderful places from which we come.  The second, and even more important thing that consoled me as I said goodbye was the hope that I have that we will all be together again one day in heaven.  After all, that is the goal for each one of us, to get to heaven and to take others there with us!

The Angelus on my last Sunday in Rome.

Tomb of St. Catherine with white roses.

The second type of friendship that I developed while in Rome is with the Church/The Holy Father/the Saints.  Being in Rome, you get a sense for the Church in a way that I don’t think you can anywhere else.  That is not saying that those who study elsewhere can’t love the Church, no.  However, there is something about being in the Eternal City and being among the dealings of the Church.  One of the most powerful experiences that I had of the Church while there is being able to attend the events surrounding the conclave and the election of Pope Francis.  Seeing the Church at prayer (and at work) was a wonderful experience, and I don’t think I have ever felt more Catholic than when I was standing in St. Peter’s Square that night watching the white smoke come out of the chimney of the Sistine Chapel and all of the other events that unfolded.  One of the missions of the NAC is to form men in the “shadow of St. Peter’s,” and to send them home with a great love for the Holy Father.  I can honestly say that this goal has certainly been achieved in my time there.  Finally, Rome, like no other place, is filled with the stories and bodies of the saints.  Being in Europe, one also has access to other places which house the bodies of the saints.  Perhaps a story can bring home what I want to say about the saints.  This past Saturday I was blessed to be able to serve as deacon for the priestly ordination of 4 men in the Archdiocese of New Orleans.  As part of the ordination rite, all of us present prayed a Litany of the Saints for the 4 men being ordained as they laid prostrate on the ground.  As we went through the list of saints names and asked them to pray for these men, I couldn’t help but think of my encounters with these holy men and women of God.  Each time they would invoke a saint to whom I have a particular devotion, I would think of how my friendship with that saint began and the time that I was able to visit their tomb.  For the sake of brevity I will recall only two.  St. Therese of Lisieux:  My devotion to St. Therese began at St. Ben’s, when one of the men being ordained in New Orleans introduced me to her.  She has followed me throughout my time in formation and has been a great help to me in difficult times.  She has also reassured me many times of my call to the priesthood by sending me white roses when I have doubted that call.  I was able to pray at her tomb in Lisieux in December of 2010.  St. Catherine of Siena:  I took a class on St. Catherine last semester and she quickly became a new favorite saint friend of mine.  She has constantly called me to suffer well, and she has given me a great example of how to do that!  She is buried in Rome, and I had the privilege of visiting her tomb often.  She teamed up with St. Therese on my last visit to Catherine’s tomb the day before I left Rome.  When I walked into Santa Maria Sopra Minerva (Where Catherine is buried) there were white roses all over…very comforting as I prepared to return home to be ordained in a few weeks!  There are many other stories and many other saints, but this gives you an idea of the types of friends I made while in Rome!  There are two reasons for including the Church, the Holy Father, and the Saints all in one.  The first is that 3 types of friendship is easier to remember than 4 or 5.  The second is that they belong together.  The Saints and Holy Father mean nothing if they are not connected to the Church.  If they are not connected to the Church, they lose what makes them special, they cease to be what they are.

Serving with Pope Francis for the 2014 Easter Vigil.

I have certainly saved the best and most important for last.  The third friendship that grew during my time in Rome is my friendship with Jesus Christ.  This was fostered by my friendship with the men in the house, by the Church/the Holy Father/the Saints, and by the constant reminder that the most important thing in formation is growing in my relationship with our Lord.  In his regular conferences to the house, the rector would always remind us to stay faithful to our daily personal pray, including our holy hour and devotions.  He would also remind us of the importance of attending Mass daily, receiving the Sacrament of Reconciliation regularly, remaining faithful to the Liturgy of the Hours, and fostering our devotion to the Blessed Mother.  All of these things are so important if any of us, priests, religious, or laity, want to grow in our love for Christ and His Church.  Being away from home also helped in the growth of my friendship with Christ.  There were many moments when I felt alone, especially early on in my time at the NAC.  One moment in particular stands out in my mind as I write.  It was a Sunday early on in my time in Rome, perhaps during the first semester.  As we finished Mass around 10:45, I thought about how if I were home I would be leaving to go to my grandmother’s house for Sunday lunch with the family.  As I thought about this I was saddened by how far away my family was.  Feeling like I had no one to turn to, I realized that I did have a friend who would never let me down, who would never be far from me, and that I HAD to turn to Him.  My friendship with Jesus grew at times out of a type of necessity, but more than that, it grew out of a realization of how much He loves me.  Realizing this love that God has for me, and growing in my love for Him has made me happier than I have ever been.  I will be forever grateful for the NAC and for my time in Rome for helping me to grow in that love.

Saying goodbye is never easy.  As I have had to say goodbye many times in the last couple of weeks, I am comforted by the fact that “Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end.”  I am so incredibly happy to be back home among the great people of the Diocese of Lafayette who have supported me so much through these last 6 years.  I look forward to all that is in store in this new beginning which will begin with ordination to the priesthood in just a few days, and my arrival on the UL campus at Our Lady of Wisdom on July 1^st!

In Christ,

Dcn. Patrick

That's My Home

     The refrain of Billy Joel's song You're My Home says "Whenever we're together that's my home."  After a typical Italian expierience of going out into the city to recharge my cell phone, only to find that the store was closed, I slipped into one of my favorite churches in the city, the Basilica of St. Andrew.  I walked in and as I was going to the side altar where the Blessed Sacrament is reposed, I noticed all of the people taking in the beauty of the church.  This particular basilica has beautiful paintings of the martyrdom of St. Andrew along with many other treasures.
     As I walked past these people captivated by the beauty of the church, I began to wonder if I was becoming calloused to beautiful churches after having been in Rome for 3 years.  Though this may be a small factor in my experience, I think something deeper was at work.  The beautiful art, the precious materials, they are all meant to lead us to God.  I have had many experience when a painting or a sculpture or the vast quantities of precious materials in a church have led me to prayer.  But in this particular moment, I didn't need them, I already knew what the real treasure was, or should I say, Who the real treasure was and where I could find Him.  No matter where in the world I find myself, no matter what is wrong, when I step into a church and kneel before the tabernacle which houses our Savior, I feel at home.  So Billy Joel was right, whenever were together, that's my home!

Love Covers a Multitude of Sins...and Shortcomings!

     Last night I was invited to speak to a group of high school students who gather at a local Church each week to discuss life.  I was invited so that they could be exposed to another seminarian to see that we are normal people (I'm still trying to figure out why I was picked to show them we are normal!).  One of the questions that I was asked after I gave a brief story of my life was "do you still get scared of not knowing how to answer people?"  Have these people been reading my journal?  That is probably the number one fear I have had recently in approaching the altar of God to be ordained a priest.  What will I say when people ask me about x, y, or z?
     The answer I gave surprised me, sort of.  I said that it is important to be vulnerable.  It is important to show people that you love them and that you are willing to stand there and not know what to say...but that you are willing to stand there anyway.  We must be willing to journey with people.  That means that we won't always know the answers, but we are willing to seek the answers together with them.
     This approach will require a lot of time and effort on our part, but it takes away a great burden.  We don't need to know all of the answers.  Of course we can't use this as an excuse not to learn as much as we can about our Catholic faith, but we must come to the point where we are humble enough to admit when we don't know...and that will happen a lot!
     The key is love. We have to love people enough to tell them the truth and to stand there when they have questions, especially "why?".  We must love them enough to stand there and take whatever may come our way when they don't agree with us or when we don't know answers, and we must love them enough to agree to journey with them in finding those answers however difficult and painful it might be.  So in the end St. Paul was right (shocking, I know), "love covers a multitude of sins," and it can also cover a multitude of our shortcomings, if we are willing to give of ourselves.

Why Am I Doing This?

     In a recent holy hour, the question came to mind "why am I doing this?"  The question was not related to the holy hour, but to my vocation; Why am I becoming a priest?  Almost immediately, the answer came to mind; "You are doing this because you have encountered the love of Christ and you want to help others to experience that same love."  This may seem like a great epiphany, but it is actually nothing new.  In fact, it is a new spin on something I have prayed on many times.  I once heard it said that we should take our lead from the Blessed Mother (duh!) in the first two mysteries of the Joyful mysteries of the Holy Rosary.  In the first mystery, the Annunciation, the angel comes to Mary and announces that she will conceive the Son of God in her womb.  God comes to Mary, she has an encounter with Him.  What is Mary's immediate response after God comes to her?  She goes in haste to visit her cousin Elizabeth.  Moved by the love of God Mary must share that love with others, with those that she loves.

     Pope Francis spoke on this phenomenon in his first encyclical saying, "Those who have opened their hearts to God’s love, heard his voice and received his light, cannot keep this gift to themselves" (Lumen Fidei 37).  God's love is so amazing, makes us so happy that we cannot keep it to ourselves once we experience it.  We must go out and bring that love to others.  We experience this with things that have no lasting value too.  When I eat at a good restaurant, I want to share it with people so they can have good food too.  When I like a brand of electronics, I tell my friends about it so that they can have a better experience with their phone, tv, radio, etc.  If we are moved to share such mundane things with our friends, it only makes sense that we would share the good news of salvation and love with them too.

Eyes on the Prize!

     A couple of weeks ago we had our annual softball tournament here at the NAC where guys from the 3 different universities we attend for the first 3 years of study play each other.  The Angelicum, which I attend had been on a winning streak for the past several years (7 or so).  However, that day the Gregorian put together a great field and came up with a big win.  I had a pretty good game by anyone's standards.  I went 3 for 4 and had many catches in the outfield.  That sounds good when you say it like that.  However, the one time I did get out, we were in prime position to puts some runs across the plate as we had at least 2 guys on base.  I hit a pretty good ball to second base, but right at the 2nd baseman and the inning ended.  I also missed one ball at a crucial point in the game which allowed the Greg to plate a couple more runs.
     The week after the game, I went to Confession.  After I had told the priest my sins he looked at me and said, "Can I ask you a personal question?"  I started thinking about my sins wondering which one he would ask about.  Then it came, "How did it feel when you missed that fly ball?"  Not really what I was expecting, but I swallowed my pride and told him something along the lines of "not too good".  He continued asking, "did you let it get to you?"  I had to be honest, so I replied, "a little bit Father".  It was a crucial point in the game and when I thought "if I could have gotten a hit and if I could have caught that fly ball, the game might have ended differently."  What was the point of asking that question though?  It came when Father told me for my penance to take that feeling when I missed the fly ball, that experience of making that mistake and pray with it, to bring it to Jesus on the Cross, then to wrap it in a Hail Mary.
     I have to admit, at first I was a little shocked.  This seemed rather silly.  It was a softball game, and though I was a little upset, in the grand scheme of things it didn't mean much.  But I agreed and I went to pray in the presence of our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament.  Almost immediately, I remembered why I missed that ball.  In the excitement of the game and in my concern with the base runners  I took my eye off the ball.  It wasn't long, maybe a fraction of a second before it went into my glove, but I took my eye off the ball.  It struck me that this is exactly why I needed to go to confession.  At different times, in different ways and to different degrees, I had taken my eyes off of Christ, off of the One who hung upon the Cross for me, who poured out his blood so that I might live.  It is not enough to be focused on Christ when things are going well,  when no one is on base, when the pressure is off.  No, it is in the times when the stakes are high that we need to focus on him the most.  The easy situations are training so that when the rubber hits the road, we will be ready and able to cling to him who is our salvation.
     Lord, I thank you for this humbling and formative experience.  I thank you for continuing to form me to be a good priest even in the most unusual and unexpected ways.  Please continue to pray for me that I may see God's hand in every event in my life.  Please especially pray that I will remained focused on Christ, our crucified and risen Lord.  In those times when we fall and feel unable to do anything on our own, we should remember the words of St. Paul that "I can do all things in him who strengthens me" (Phil 4:13).

In Christ,
Patrick

We’ve Only Just Begun…The After Party

     After all of the excitement in the Square, we headed back to the College.  There, as I walked in, I was asked to serve the prayer service that we would have to pray for our new Holy Father as he had just asked us to do.  In excitement me and one of the others who had been asked to serve ran down one of the halls and jumped bumping hips (as football players do to celebrate a touchdown - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlEhKi14kaw...see around 8 seconds) and ran off to get our albs.  We returned to the sacristy a little more subtly and received our instructions.

     This was a very powerful experience.  Again we had 250+ in the chapel all gathered to beg God to bless our new pope, that he might be docile to the promptings of the Holy Spirit and lead the Church in the direction God desires it to go.  The first thing that jumped out as we entered the chapel is that in the dead of Lent, the altar cloth and other decorations were a brilliant golden color.  In this season of penance and sacrifice, we rejoiced in the election of Pope Francis.  We processed in with incense, candles and the crucifix and were led in prayer by our rector.  The Blessed Sacrament was exposed and we prayed in silent adoration for 10 minutes.  Then, the choir led us in chanting the Te Deum, an ancient song of thanksgiving.  The Blessed Sacrament was then reposed and we exited the chapel.

     After this most appropriate way of thanking God for giving us a new pope we continued the celebration in the Student Lounge.  As “King STUAC,” I had the great privilege of announcing that we would have a free night (everything in the lounge was paid for by STUAC – Student Activities Committee).  This of course brought most of the house down to the lounge to enjoy a drink and snack (we hadn’t eaten dinner since we were supposed to eat after the release of what we thought would be black smoke).  There, the rector more informally led the community in thanking God for giving us Pope Francis as our earthly shepherd.  He then gave the College’s first (unofficial) toast to the Holy Father after which we all joined in singing Ad Multos Annos.  The joy at the College was visible.  We didn’t really know what to do.  What do you tell someone when a new pope is elected?  Congratulations?  Good job?  We didn’t know, but we were all happy and even though it had just happened in the last 2 hours, we were already recounting how it all went down in our particular part of the square, what each of our individual experience was like.

     One of the most moving parts of the night came when our rector said that the cardinals were making their way back to the College.  Many of the students went to welcome them back.  It turned out that about 100 of us lined up along the walls of the hallway where they would come out of the Red Room through which they entered the College.  As we were standing there waiting, we began to do different cheers, slow claps and the like.  The energy was palpable, and you could see the joy in people’s face.  We chanted for the rector and for the different priests that work at the College as they came by.  The loudest cheers came for the Jesuit priests as one of their own was now our pope.  Finally after about 20 minutes of waiting the Cardinals arrived and began coming out through our line of seminarians.  As they did, we chanted their names and gave monstrous rounds of applause.  They were really taken aback by this.  I heard from one seminarian that his cardinal was really moved by this experience.  Seminarians cheering like at a soccer match (we were in fact modifying cheers that we use at our soccer games to fit the cardinals names) for the men who had just elected the next Successor of St. Peter.  I have never experienced anything like that before in my life.  Of course, Cardinal Dolan took it all in stride.  He was so impressed that he informed us that he would sponsor a free night in our lounge the following Sunday for St. Patrick’s Day.  That night, the cardinals were like rock stars to us!

     After the cheering and arrival of all of the Cardinals that were staying with us at the College they were divided up to different rooms to conduct interviews.  I stepped into the interview of Cardinal Dolan for a listen.  It was great to hear from him (which was reiterated later at a talk by 4 other cardinals) that the conclave was a tremendous time of prayer and discernment for the Cardinals.  He assured the faithful that the Holy Spirit really guided the cardinals in their selection and that the prayers of the faithful from around the world were felt and very much appreciated.

As Pope Francis begins his Petrine Ministry, I am so thankful that I have had this opportunity to be in Rome for such an historic event in the life of the Church and indeed the whole world.  I am glad that I have had this opportunity to reflect and get down on paper how the events of the last few weeks touched my heart.  My love for the Church has grown so much through witnessing these events and it is my hope that these reflections have been an opportunity to share that love with others so that they too might grow in love for Holy Mother Church.  Let us pray for Pope Francis and for all of the cardinals that they might continue to grow in love for Jesus Christ.  It is only through love for Christ that they will be able to effectively lead us, the faithful in our journey toward our heavenly homeland.

Reflections from the Conclave and Election of Pope Francis

In St. Peter's after the Mass for
the opening of the conclave.

            After days of waiting for all of the 115 elector cardinals to arrive in the Eternal City, they finally came together and agreed that the conclave to elect the next pope would begin on Tuesday, March 12, 2013.  On that morning when the conclave was to begin there was a Mass in St. Peter’s Basilica to pray for the outpouring of the Holy Spirit on the Cardinals that they might elect the man who was already known to God to lead His Church.  The “day of pageantry” as it was dubbed by one news outlet was truly special and something to behold.  To an outsider it may just look like any other organization pulling out the fine decorations and clothing for a nice event, but for me as a Catholic seminarian on the verge of being ordained a priest (God willing) it was much, much more!  This was the most powerful men in the Church processing to the altar of God to implore his mercy, grace, wisdom and knowledge so that they might choose the man that would please Him.  The Mass for the opening of the Conclave shows how much the Cardinals realize that they can do nothing good on their own.  Rather, they must rely on God for everything if they are to live in accord with His will.  What a great lesson this is for all of us.

The Papal Liturgist removing everyone who isn't a voting cardinal from
the chapel (with the words extra omnes) and locking the doors.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QU0c2gKEQ2c

            That afternoon the cardinals went through the rules of the conclave and after each one approached the altar and swore his promise to abide by the rules, everyone but the 115 voting cardinals were removed from the Sistine Chapel and the voting began.  The first day there was only one vote and the smoke was to go up around 7pm.  A pope being elected on the first day is virtually impossible.  However, I went down to the square to witness the smoke, even if it was going to be black because this was a great moment in history.  As we all expected, the smoke was black, the cardinals did not elect a new pope on the first vote.  As the smoke began coming out the whole square gasped and awed until it was clear that the smoke was black.  We returned to the College ready for another day of suspense and excitement.

            The next morning (Wednesday, March 13, 2013) I was scheduled to give the presentation for my seminar.  Due to a wise seminarian and a very understanding professor, we moved the location of our seminar from the university (a 35 minute walk from St. Peter’s) to our College (a 5 minute walk or 2 minute fun run from St. Peter’s).  Some of the guys in the class had their computers and were watching online for early smoke signaling a new pope.  The early smoke never came and with the 11:45am ballot burning, black smoke was once again released into the Roman sky.  We were relieved and could rest our minds and hearts for a couple of hours until the next potential release of smoke.

            This next chance for smoke would be around 5:30pm and would only happen if a pope was elected on the 1^st ballot of the afternoon voting session.  Due to the circumstances, the College changed the daily house schedule to accommodate our desire to be in the square at key times.  One way the schedule changed was that the 5:45pm holy hour was moved to 5:15pm and Evening Prayer was moved to 6:15pm.  This would have EP ending at 6:30pm, which would give the students plenty of time to get down to the square for the 7:00pm release of smoke.  As I sat in the chapel for the 5:15 holy hour the thought ran through my mind several times that a 5:30pm early release of smoke would mean I would miss it and have to run to the square late.  I was somewhat anxious, but I was comforted thinking, “This is where I need to be”.  Praying for the cardinals took on a whole new meaning as I thought about them at that very moment in the Sistine Chapel placing their votes.  Where else could I do a better service to them, to the Church and to God at that moment than on my knees in front of our Eucharistic Lord?  I would be lying if I said I was completely calm the whole hour I was praying.  Several times when I heard the door open I waited to see if someone would say that they had released smoke and that we needed to get down to the square.  As it turns out, God rewards those who are faithful to Him…5:30pm came and went and no smoke reared its head from the chimney in the square.

            At 6:15pm we had community evening prayer.  For several days before up to that very night, we had been praying a special prayer for the election of a pope together as a community just before evening prayer.  In the minutes before we began, the lector for that day went up to the ambo and 250+ priests, deacons and seminarians got on their knees to ask God for his guidance of the cardinals.    After this, we prayed EP (In a homily today (March 15, 2015) it was pointed out that it could have been at the precise moment that we were praying evening prayer that the cardinals were electing the new pope…powerful) and when it was over, the entire College joined much of Rome in heading down to St. Peter’s Square.  The only way to describe what happened after EP is to say that it was like a sports dressing room…let me explain.  We have a long narrow room outside of the chapel where guys will leave things if they are going out after prayer.  There were literally about 100 guys going in their putting on coats, grabbing cameras and umbrellas and getting ready to go.

After I got my jacket and cameras and swam through the people I made my way out of the College with some of my friends.  I made a comment about needing to go to the bathroom, but figured I would be back in a few minutes and I didn’t want to be late, so we left.  As we approached the square the line was pretty long and they were ushering people through security.  There is no pope and the cardinals are all in one place…not sure why they were doing this.  We joked saying maybe they knew something we didn’t.  We quickly made our way through “security” and into the square.  Once in the square we got to where we could see one of the TV screens since the chimney is pretty hard to see at night.  I was satisfied with our position, but the guys I was with wanted to move into a better position.  Since they led the way, I agreed to follow.  We moved closer to the center of the basilica and further up in the square and ended up next to one of the religious sisters who teaches us at the university.  We chatted for a while as it was still about 10 minutes before 7:00pm.

WHITE SMOKE coming from the chimney!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lc78mF1hnvw

I had my back turned to the screen when I heard the collective gasp of the crowd alerting me that the smoke had begun.  I finished my conversation then turned around expecting to see black smoke.  It was grey at first and then with the noise in the square getting greater with every passing second, it quickly became apparent that it was in fact WHITE SMOKE!  I still can’t put into words what seeing that smoke made me feel.  I couldn’t believe it.  I didn’t want to act like a fool only to find out that it was black.  I denied it saying over and over again, “no, no, no way, no.”  Then one of the guys in our group said what I was waiting for, “the bells are going.”  This was it.  The cardinals had done their job and elected a new Roman Pontiff, a new leader of the Catholic Church.  I continued saying “no,” what by know was the only word it seems I knew, more in disbelief that I was in the square witnessing history than because I actually thought the smoke was black.  How could this be?  Why is God so good to me?  How had the cardinals elected a pope in the 5^th vote when going into the conclave there was no clear frontrunner?  I was already planning to miss class on Thursday and Friday because I wanted to be in the square for the white smoke, yet here it was and there I was, witnessing history with hundreds of thousands from around the world and with some of my closest friends from the NAC.

"The bells are going!"

We quickly ran up closer to the basilica with the rest of the crowd and we all crammed in.  It had been a rainy night in Rome, but when the smoke bellowed out of the chimney and those big beautiful bells on the left side of the façade of St. Peter’s began announcing to the world that a pope had been elected, the skies closed up and it turned into a beautiful Roman night!  We squished and crammed our way as close as we could with about 300,000 of our closest friends and awaited the announcement and appearance of our new pope.  We happened to meet up with a reporter for Vatican Radio and she asked our thoughts on when, what name, etc. before the smoke.  She managed to stay with us as we moved up and continued to ask us our feelings.  I feel like my answers sounded much like me moving my finger across my lips like a little kid because I couldn’t get any words out.

What ensued was absolutely amazing (because it hadn’t been up to this point right?).  Several bands dressed in their regalia began marching out into the front part of the square: the Swiss Guard Band (glad to have a new pope and a job again), the Carabinieri Band, and a few others.  Lights began coming on in windows on the façade of St. Peter’s and about 1 hour after the smoke first began, we were ready to welcome our new father.  First, the cardinal came out for the famous announcement.  Annuntio vobis gaudium magnum, HABEMUS PAPAM!  I announce to you a great joy, we have a pope!  (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsmrMPc3PYw)  Then he proceeded to say that they elected George…we looked at each other thinking, “Cardinal George?”…then came his last name Cardinal Bergoglio…we all looked at each other and asked, “Who?”.  One of my friends had seen his name just that morning on a possible candidates list and so he told us he was an Argentinean Cardinal.  We cheered and waited for him to make his first appearance.

As the curtains began to move the crowd let out short scattered cheers, but when they parted and the pope began to come out, led by the Crucifix, the entire square and beyond let up a great roar.  After the cheers went on for a while the new Vicar of Christ greeted his flock for the first time.  He stood there stiff, looking uncomfortable and unsure and we wondered if he was going to faint.  We all looked at each other as if to ask, what’s going on, what’s happened.  Then he began, “brothers and sisters…good evening.”  (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XLEdR0HMoM) As he said “good evening” a grin appeared on his face and he immediately won the hearts of many of us in that square and around the world.  My friend recounted the experience by saying that we were standing there watching, asking for him just to give us one little sign of his affection and we would love him and he did just that with “good evening.”  They were simple words from a simple man, and that was all it took.  He then asked that we join him in prayer for Benedict XVI, bishop emeritus of Rome, who had guided the Church for 8 years before him.  He led us in the Our Father, Hail Mary and Glory Be for Benedict.  For us who have such a great love for Benedict, this was an amazingly comforting gesture and really helped to show just how humble Pope Francis really is.  After that he asked that before he gave his first Apostolic Blessing, that we pray that God would bless him.  He bowed down and 300,000+ were dead silent for a few moments.  I don’t know if I’ve ever prayed that hard in my life, asking the Holy Spirit, who had led the cardinals to elected Pope Francis, to flood him with his presence so that he might lead the Church of Christ well.

"The Church is young, and She is alive!"

Aside from the birth of my nieces and nephew, I don’t know that I have ever fallen in love with someone as quickly as did with Pope Francis.  He radiates the simplicity that he preaches.  With two simple words it seems as though he won my heart, “buona serra” (good evening).  His humility in praying for Benedict and in asking us to pray for him had a major impact on me.  After that night in the square, I now know what people mean when they say that the atmosphere was electric, or that the joy was palpable.  I still cannot explain the emotions I experience that night.  I also cannot adequately describe the sense of joy and love I had seeing that white smoke rise and being surrounded by thousands and thousands of people who braved what began as a nasty Roman night to see an old man dressed in white walk out on to a balcony.  The words of Benedict XVI at his last audience echoed in my mind as I stood in that square, “The Church is young and She is alive!”