Boring Prayer Life or True Friendship?

     As I was walking to class one day recently I was thinking about what seemed like a very mediocre (at best) holy hour I made that morning.  It seemed to me like I had been having many of these types of holy hours where "not much was happening."  In many talks I have given as a seminarian on prayer I have told people that prayer is developing our friendship with God.  I then began to think about my friendships.  This led me to an interesting realization.
     When you spend time with friends what do you do?  Many times at the beginning of a friendship, you will find out many interesting things about a person; where they grew up, what their childhood was like, what they do for a living, favorite movies, how many brothers and sisters they have, what they hope to do in life, etc.  This period can last for quite some time as each person is unique and has a history spanning many years, even several decades.  However, even if this initial stage of getting to know someone last for a few years, eventually the friendship will change, it must change!  Eventually, we will no longer learn something new about the other person every time we get together, at least not one that will make us think twice.  Despite this change, or rather because of this change, our friendship will go to a new level, it will continue to grow and deepen, only in different ways.
     Reaching this new stage of friendship, we will simply be happy to be in the other's presence.  We will not need to learn anything new about them, or even do anything.  I'm sure we have all had the experience of going to the movie with someone...you don't say anything to one another in the movie (hopefully, especially if you are sitting next to me), but you still enjoy your time together.  This also applies to our relationship with God.  God is infinite, and His Word can always speak to us, revealing something new.  But God is not going to entertain us.  At the beginning of our relationship, he will try to "woo" us, to draw us into his loving presence.  However, once we make that gesture of returning our love to Him, he may seem to fade away.  Many of the great saints have experienced this and some have gone through intense periods of what felt like abandonment by God called a "dark night."  In reading the writings of people in a dark night of the soul, the reader can tell that God is actually close to the person.  The one going through this pain, however, is so close to God that they cannot see his presence.
     I went through a period when I was in minor seminary where I would walk into the chapel in the morning and the first thing that would come to mind is the Eric Clapton song that goes "hello old friend, it sure is good to see you once again."  After a couple of days of this I started to ask what was wrong with me that I would think of such a song in the presence of our Lord.  Once I recognized it and thought about it, I realized that it was not necessarily a bad thing.  I had become familiar with God and simply being with Him was enough, I didn't need to do anything, to have any major revelations.  I started to see this as a blessing to be able to walk into the chapel and say hello, to realize that God truly was an old friend!
     All this being said, we must always be alert in our prayer life so that we do not become lazy and allow our minds to wonder.  There is a difference between God speaking to us in silence for our own good and us coming to prayer distracted and not putting in the effort.  The next time you are thinking that your prayer life is boring, spend some time in prayer to see if maybe your friendship with God has progressed to the point where He no longer has to entertain you, then persevere through the difficulties!

O Come Let us Adore Him,
Patrick

Greatness

     I want to be a saint!  I frequently think about this and I think that it is good and healthy.  We believe that a saint is someone who has made it, anyone who has entered into the presence of God in heaven.  In this sense, we should all want to be saints one day.
     My problem arises because I don't just want to be a saint who makes it to heaven, I want to be a great saint!  Now, again on the surface, this is not a bad thing, but when I really look at my motives I begin to see the problem.  What is it about being a saint that really attracts me?  Well, when I am honest about myself it has a lot to do with the way people think about the saints.  Hearing about the heroic acts of a St. Maximillian Kolbe giving up his life for another in Auswitz, staring at the volumes and volumes of the writings of the Angelic Doctor (Thomas Aquinas) or the Doctor of Grace (St. Augustine), learning about the conversion and susequent work of St. Ignatius Loyola, and reading the account of the martyrdom of St. Polycarp makes me want to be a saint even a martyr!  But is it love of God I am seeking or greatness?  Isn't greatness a good thing?  After all St. Thomas Aquinas listed magnanimity as a virtue; Pope Benedict stated that we are not made for comfort but for greatness.
     Shouldn't we want to be great?  YES!  But greatness takes on a new look when we speak about it in relation to being a saint as opposed to the world's view.  None of the saints I mentioned (none at all for that matter) became great by simply seeking after greatness.  They all became saints by seeking after Him, Greatness Himself.  It was only because of their amazing love for God that they were able to do great things.  In fact, they didn't do great things, God did great things through them because they were humble enough to let Him.  Mother Theresa was well known for saying that we cannot do great things, only small things with great love.  There is something about those Theresas.  Mother Theresa and St. Therese (the Little Flower) can teach us a great deal about this.
     When they first began their ministries I'm sure they did not think they were doing great things.  One was ministering to the poorest of the poor and one was living in a convent and very sick.  In Mother Theresa, we see the means by which we can become great, the starting point for all saints.  We must do the little things that our life demands right now!  These thoughts came to me when the Gospel was about the lost sheep.  The shepherd, losing one sheep, leaves the 99 and goes in search for the 1 lost sheep.  Now, I've never shepherded sheep, but this seems ridiculous.  Leaving 99 sheep to try to save one.  But such is the love of our God for us; it is ridiculous, at times it doesn't make sense.  God's love doesn't make sense to us because it is too great for us to understand.  The aspect of this reading the Mother Theresa lived was this.  There are always 100 things that we could be doing.  We must focus on the 1 thing we are doing, the 1 person we are helping.  Our greatness must begin with the person God has sent into our lives at each moment.  We must show His love for them through our words and actions.  It is only through humble service of each individual we encounter throughout each day that we will truly become great, we will become saints.  We will not be great in the eyes of the world.  Rather, we will be great in the eyes of the One who really matters.
     Let us spend time in prayer during this season of Advent of the lowliness that our God took on in order to bring us to greatness.  He humbled Himself and became man so that we could become like Him.  May this season of joyful anticipation for the coming of Christ anew into the world and in our lives help us to grow in our love for Jesus, the Savior of the world!

Divine Providence...Do You Believe?

Tomb of Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati

      God has shown me over and over and over and over (you get the point) in the past 12 years or so since I really began to take my faith life seriously that he is in charge and is involved in every single aspect of my life.  This entry will focus on a series of events which took place over the last year.
     It all began over an innocent travel weekend to Salamanca, Spain.  I went with two other guys from the College and we had a wonderful time relaxing, praying and spending time with the sister of one of the guys who was studying there.  The same seminarian also knew a group of religious sisters who are located in Madrid (where we flew in and out of).  On the "last" day of our trip, we visited the religious community before heading off in a rush to eat at T. G. I. Fridays before hurrying over to the airport to catch our flight.  We accomplished all of this, made our way to the airport, got rid of the bottle of wine we had purchased because we didn't want to check bags and made our way over to the security line.  The first of us made it through the security ticket check and as he was proceeding to go through security, the lady checking our tickets told him to wait as she noticed that our tickets were for Nov. 2nd (the next day), not Nov. 1 (today).  We smiled at her in disbelief and said, "no, we have to be back today, they have to be for today."  Well we were wrong, our tickets did not have to be for today as they were in fact for tomorrow.  After trying several different ways to get back to Rome and to the College on time (the cheapest option being about 600 Euro per person and not even a guarantee) we bit the bullet and called the College to let them know of our mistake and that we would be staying in Madrid for the night.
     As we had not planned to stay the night in Madrid we had no arrangements for a place to sleep.  We went back to the religious sisters that we had visited earlier to see if they could help.  They ended up getting us rooms at the seminary just down the road.  During our second trip to the house, we joined the sisters in a Spanish All Saints Day tradition.  On Nov. 1st, they put the names of many different saints in a bowl and everyone draws a name.  The name you pull is your saint for the following year.  We all took our turn drawing from the bowl and when it came to me I picked one Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati.  Now before this I had heard about Blessed Pier Giorgio...very little, but I had heard of him.  I knew he died young and that he was a very active outdoors type, but that was about it.  Thus began my relationship with this young man from Turin, Italy.

Cathedral of Turin where Bl. Pier Giorgio is buried

     The saints have an amazing way of coming into your life.  It seems at times they they will haunt/stalk/follow you around.  This is precisely what happened with Bl. Pier Giorgio.  Since this providential meeting in Spain he has appeared over and over again during the course of this year.  When I went back home for the summer I recalled the travel weekend story to a friend.  Having a devotion to Bl. Pier Giorgio herself, she loaned me a book about him written by his sister.  I then shared a quote from the book via Facebook and another friend saw it who also has a great devotion to Bl. Pier Giorgio.  In his generosity this friend mailed me two other books on Bl. Pier Giorgio, a whole slew of prayer cards and other information on him which were waiting for me at the College when I returned in September.  I have read one of the books and I have a Bl. Pier Giorgio prayer card in just about every book I am using at the moment.
     This past weekend was a travel weekend for us here.  I decided to travel with one other seminarian and we were going to make it interesting.  We made no plans and had no destination in mind.  We simply showed up to class on Friday with our bags packed and after they were done we headed to the train station to pick a random place to visit.  When we arrived we looked at the departure board to see where we would end up.  A train leaving in about 8 minutes heading where else but to Turin, the hometown of Bl. Pier Giorgio and the city where his remains are now located.  We bought our tickets, got on the train and we were off.  After booking a hotel from the train and waiting the 4+ hours it took to get there, we arrived in the city of the young Blessed.  I was beyond excited!  What were the odds that I would end up in Turin without planning it just 5 days before my "Year of Bl. Pier Giorgio" was over (it will be one year since my Spain trip on Nov. 1, 2012).

Memorial on the wall at Bl. Pier Giorgio's parish Church

     As Catholics, we believe that there is no such thing as luck.  Rather, our loving God and Father puts things into our lives when and how we need them in order to draw us closer to Himself.  God wanted to teach me something through the life of this young saintly man.  Bl. Pier Giorgio died at the age of 24 (NB: That is the same age at which St. Therese died) from polio.  During his short time on earth Bl. Pier Giorgio touched the lives of thousands of people.  This is evident in the pictures of his funeral procession where people from all over Turin gathered to say goodbye to their native son.  Maybe God wanted me to see that even people who seem insignificant can make a huge difference.  Maybe God wanted to show me that it is possible to suffer without complaining (in fact I'm sure this is at least part of the reason Bl. Pier Giorgio found me!).  Maybe God wanted to remind me to always be concerned for the poor.  It is likely that all of these reasons (and many more) played a part in my coming to know Bl. Pier Giorgio.  I pray that I will not overlook any aspect of whatever it is that God wants to teach me through the life of his servant Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati and I pray that you will take the time to get to know him too!

In Christ,
Patrick

Appealing to the Senses

     This is a little update to my previous post.  I wrote there about the appeal to the senses, especially that of sight in the Church.  This past weekend, I was blessed to be able to travel to Turin.  My main goal was to pray at the tomb of Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati who has been haunting me (in a good way) for the past year (full post to come with that story).  Another great gift of this trip was being able to spend time in the Cathedral where they house the Shroud of Turin, which many believe to be the burial shroud of Christ.  Though the shroud was not on display there was a picture hanging above the protective case where it is housed.  Praying in the presence of the shroud and gazing upon the image of Christ's face was an amazing and powerful experience for me.  I kept gazing up at the image and thinking about the quote from the last post, "We have seen God and we will never be the same!"  Wow!

In Christ,
Patrick

It Just Makes Sense!

     "We have seen God and we will never be the same!"  This statement was made by the priest chaplain for the University of Dallas campus here in Rome where I will be helping out for the next two years.  Father gave this statement as a one sentence summary to explain Christianity to someone who knew nothing about our religion.
     What I will try to focus on in this entry is that fact that we have SEEN God.  God, throughout the Old Testament period, revealed Himself in various ways to the people of Israel.  One way in which he did this is by revealing His holy name, which out of respect for our Jewish brothers and sisters we do not use in the Liturgy.  The Hebrews believed that knowing a person's name was a very intimate way of knowing someone, it revealed to the knower an intimate part of the person.  For God to draw close to his people in this way was a new and shocking thing.
     After several covenants and several failures on the part of man to uphold his end of the agreement, God chose to reveal Himself in an even more shocking way.  God the Father, sent his Son Jesus Christ in human form.  In Christ, we have seen God!  We truly can never be the same.
     In both instances, God revealed himself to man by appealing to man's senses.  The Israelites heard God's name and with the coming of Christ, men have seen God.  We are bodily creatures and we come to know things through the body.  This is explained by E. Schillebeeckx in his book Christ the Sacrament of the Encounter with God as follows:

"Because God loves man and has a sovereign respect for our earthbound humanity -for our reality as persons who in their own bodiliness live in a world of people and of things, and thereby grow to spiritual maturity - God always offers us the kingdom of heaven in an earthly guise. So he did in the Old Testament. So it was in the ephapax: the appearance once and for all of God the Redeemer in human shape. So, too, finally, does he continue to teach us in the sacramental Church which is the visible organ on earth of the living Lord."

We experience God through the senses, and we are also engaged through the senses.  This is why the Church uses beautiful music, incense, candles, flowers, beautiful church buildings, etc.

     As I said earlier, I want to focus on sight (having trouble so far, but stay with me!).  One day this past week I got out of class early and decided to fulfill one of my formation goals by making a holy hour in one of the churches in the city.  As it is my favorite church and I wanted to say prayers at a certain statue housed there, I decided to make my way over to the Basilica of St. Augustine.  As I sat before the tabernacle I took a moment to examine the paintings on the walls and ceiling.  I had never noticed two of them before, both of which depicted Mass being celebrated.  In the picture above, notice how there is a beam of light coming from the Cross (from which all the sacraments derive their power) through the host being elevated after it has been consecrated (transformed from ordinary bread into the body of Christ) and to the people attending Mass.  It shows the efficacy of the sacrament, i.e. it shows that we receive grace from the sacrament.  In the picture to the left you see the priest celebrating Mass and as he prays the words of consecration, in the background, angels are lifting people to heaven.  When I saw this, I was reminded of the IV Dialogue of Gregory the Great in which he recalls many pious events, one of which was the confirmation that loved ones had passed form purgatory to heaven after Mass had been celebrated for their intention (The IV Dialogue is a great and easy read for anyone who is interested!).

     Why do I bring up these paintings?  Because they moved me during my holy hour.  They reminded me of the power of the Mass and of the closeness of our God.  We can still see him anytime we go to Mass or adoration.  True, we can see God anywhere if we are open to his providence, but we can really, physically see him under the appearance of bread and wine.  Beautiful pieces of art, such as these two, along with all of the other things the Church utilizes (some were mentioned earlier) help us to enter into the mystery of the Trinity, God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit!

     Lastly, I will leave you with a verse from Scripture I came upon last night during my holy hour.  It comes from the Gospel of St. Matthew 6:22-23.  “The lamp of the body is the eye. If your eye is sound, your whole body will be filled with light; but if your eye is bad, your whole body will be in darkness. And if the light in you is darkness, how great will the darkness be."  In a world that is filled with so many negative images, on TV, in movies, and in just about every advertisement around, this passage should strike a chord in us.  With what are we filling ourselves through the lamp of our body?  Are we constantly taking in things that lead us into darkness or do we take time to admire beautiful things that can lead us to contemplate the One True God?

From the Mouths of Babes

     "Out of the mouths of infants and nurslings you have brought forth praise" (Matthew 21:16).  This passage came to mind as I shared a nice evening with my adopted family this summer (each seminarian in the diocese gets an adopted family to pray for them and to get to know them).  When I first arrived to their house two of the boys were outside playing a grueling game of ping pong.  I went out to watch them while the Mrs. finished preparing the meal.  Soon she and the man of the house joined us outside (he later crushed me in an embarrassing match).  The younger of the two brothers playing greeted me, looked at me, and with all the innocence and sincerity of a child said, "that's great that you are going to be a priest, but don't you want children?"
     Without hesitating I said, "sure, but I get to come and hang out with great families like yours."  Now, after for years in the seminary and a couple more years before I actually entered when I was considering the priesthood, I have heard this question many times.  I said the same thing this time as I have said before, but I answered the question differently.  Before that moment, I had heard the answer and I knew it in my head, but now I was responding from my heart.  I truly felt like I was being fulfilled, in a way, of the desire one has to have children.  No doubt a new dimension of fulfillment will enter in when I become a priest and begin to father spiritual children.  As I write this, I can't help but think of Pope Benedict's words during the Mass at which he was inaugurated as pope.  Speaking about John Paul II's call to young people, "Do not be afraid!  Open wide the doors for Christ," Pope Benedict said "Do not be afraid of Christ! He takes nothing away, and he gives you everything. When we give ourselves to him, we receive a hundredfold in return. Yes, open, open wide the doors to Christ – and you will find true life."
     In calling me to "come follow me" as a seminarian and God-willing as a priest in less than two years, I can honestly say that Christ has taken nothing from me.  Rather, he has given me more than I could have ever expected and certainly more than I deserve.  I am very thankful to my adopted brother for asking me that question and for helping me to realize how far I have come, or rather, how far God has brought me.
     Coming off of a summer of wonderful experiences at home, an easy transition back to life in Rome and weeks of conferences and retreat, I am more excited now than ever about the idea of being a priest.  I can't wait to soak up as much knowledge as I can in these last two years of seminary formation and finally return home to minister to the great people of South Louisiana!  As always let us pray for one another.

In Christ,
Patrick

3 is a "Magic" Number

     The Holy Trinity (Father, Son and Spirit).
     Faith, Hope and Charity
     Jesus, Mary and Joseph
     Track numbers 7, 8, 9 from John Mayer's "Heavier Things" album.
     August 26th, 27th, and 28th.

     3 is a "magic" number.  These words from the schoolhouse rock song come to mind today on the Feast of St. Monica.  Even though the above references to wonderful things that come in 3s are substantially different with the Trinity being the Truth of all truths and John Mayer songs being merely my opinion.  Nevertheless, great things do come in threes.

     August 26th, 27th, and 28th fall somewhere in between the Trinity and the John Mayer songs (undoubtedly these days are closer to the Blessed Trinity).  August 26th happens to be the birthday of one of the most special ladies in my life, my mother.  I can't even begin to describe how much I owe to this wonderful lady.  She has not only fulfilled her motherly duties, but has gone above and beyond to make sure that I (along with my siblings) am happy.  She has also helped my dad to hand down the beautiful Catholic faith to me for which I am preparing to give my life as a priest.  This last aspect of caring for my eternal happiness and well-being is what ties her and her birthday to today, August 27th, the Feast of St. Monica.

     St. Monica was the mother of St. Augustine, arguably the most influential saint in the history of the Church.  However, Augustine may never have come to know Christ if it weren't for his mother.  See, Augustine is the poster child for people who search for the truth.  His search led him to embrace many creeds during his early years.  All of the religions he tried came up short.  The entire time that he was searching, Monica, like a good mother, was praying for him to come to Christianity.  Finally, after much resisting and searching, Augustine came to faith in Jesus Christ in the Church.  One of my favorite quotes from Augustine's Confessions is when Monica is begging the bishop to speak to her son to talk some sense in to him.  After much pestering, the bishop turns to Monica and tells her to stop crying and to go away, "for there is no way that a child of this many tears will go unsaved."  Augustine says that Monica went away confident that the good bishop was right and worried no more.

     This brings us to day 3, August 28th, the Feast of St. Augustine.  St. Augustine changed my life, plain and simple.  Through a class I took on The Philosophy of St. Augustine, I came to know this renegade truth seeker turned saint.  I took the class during my 3rd of 4 semesters of philosophy.  Up until this point I had made my way through philosophy, but certainly did not love it.  I found it rather difficult coming from an engineering background.  And to think, this relationship with St. Augustine could very easily not have happened.  See this course was an elective, and it put me up to 18 hours, which was not too bad in itself.  The real kicker was that it was my 3rd class with one particular professor, who though very good, was very demanding.  Even the professor told a friend of mine that I shouldn't do it.  However, there was one thing I couldn't overlook.  It was my last chance to take the class as he does not offer it every semester and the last day to drop the class was August 28th, St. Augustine's Feast day.  I just couldn't do that to Augustine, so I decided to stick it out.  I learned a great deal about St. Augustine during this course, and a great deal about myself.  It was also a nice window into Pope Benedict's thinking as he sees himself more in line with Augustine's thinking than St. Thomas Aquinas (another contender for greatest saint/theologian ever!).  Just think, some of the most moving lines in the Christian world come from St. Augustine who may not have even become a Christian were it not for his mother.  We certainly thank God for the gift of St. Augustine, but we must in the same breath remember to thank God for Monica too.  Anytime we read "Late have I loved You O Beauty ever ancient and ever new, late have I loved You," or "Our hearts are made for You and they will not rest until they rest in You," we should offer a prayer of thanks giving to God for raising both Monica and Augustine to the glory of heaven!  Finally, one of my favorite quotes is when Augustine is speaking about how his mother kept after him when he was younger.  He states that back then, he thought it was just his mother harassing him, but as he looks back after his conversion, he sees that it was really God speaking to him through Monica.  What humility and wisdom he must have had to be able to realize and admit this.

     I will end by giving thanks to God for the wonderful opportunity to pray at the tombs of both Monica and Augustine over the past two years.  Augustine is buried in a small town outside of Milan called Pavia and Monica is buried in the Basilica of St. Augustine in Rome.  I go to that church often to pray at her tomb.  I especially like to offer prayers for my mother, grandmother, sister, sister-in-law, and all of the mothers who contact me to ask for my prayers.  May St. Monica continue to be an example to mothers of how their faithfulness in desperate times can truly work miracles.

In Christ,
Patrick